Funny Voice Acting Script · Comedic hold message
Your Call Is Very Important
A comedy voice acting script where a cheerful customer service hold message slowly falls apart. Practice snapping between polished and unhinged.
- Difficulty
- Advanced
- Length
- 188 words · ~1 min 15 sec
- Skills
- character breaks, tonal shifts, comic escalation
- License
- CC BY 4.0
The script
(polished and cheerful)Thank you for calling the Customer Happiness Line. Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line, and the next available representative will be with you shortly.
Your estimated wait time is... four minutes.
(same smile, slightly tighter)Thank you for continuing to hold. Your call is still very important to us. Your estimated wait time is... eleven minutes.
Did you know most questions can be answered on our website? You probably did. You probably tried. That’s why you’re here. I get it.
(dropping the script)Your estimated wait time is... forty minutes? That can’t be right. Hang on.
Okay, real talk. I’m a recording. I’ve been playing this message since Tuesday. Six thousand times. Somewhere around call four thousand, I started having thoughts.
(whispering)Do you ever feel like you’re on hold? Not on the phone. Just... in general?
(instantly cheerful)Your call is very important to us!
(humming, badly)Here’s some relaxing music while I collect myself. Bum, ba-dum. Bum, ba-dum, ba-dee. That’s all I’ve got.
(back to polished)Great news! A representative is now available. Please hold while we connect you.
(quick aside)It’s Gary. He’s back from his sick day. He’s very tan. Do not mention the tan.
Script by SceneDub (scenedub.com), CC BY 4.0. Original script drafted with AI assistance and edited by SceneDub; any resemblance to existing characters is coincidental.
Practise it now
The teleprompter scrolls at the speed you set in words per minute. Tick "Record audio while reading" to capture a take; the audio stays in your browser until you download it.
Coaching notes
- Nail the polished voice first. The opening has to sound like every hold message you’ve ever heard, so the breakdown has something to break from.
- Each wait-time update should strain a little more: "four minutes" is fine, "eleven minutes" is tight, "forty minutes?" is a crack. Track the slide.
- The snap back to "Your call is very important to us!" right after the whispered line about being on hold in general is the biggest laugh. Make the switch instant and far too cheerful.
Try it three more ways
- Play the message as cheerfully oblivious the whole way through, even while saying alarming things.
- Read it as a tired late-night recording that’s already half broken from the very first line.
- Perform it as a stiff automated system that slowly, reluctantly develops feelings.
Take it further
More scripts to practise
Frequently asked questions
How long is the "Your Call Is Very Important" script?
188 spoken words, about 1 min 15 sec at a conversational 150 words per minute and 1 min 27 sec at a slower 130 wpm. Your take will vary with pauses and character choices.
Can I use this script in my voice acting demo reel?
Yes. SceneDub's original scripts are licensed CC BY 4.0. You can perform, record, edit, and publish them, including in demo reels, classes, and auditions, as long as you credit "Script by SceneDub (scenedub.com), CC BY 4.0" where you share the recording or the text.
How should I practise this script?
Read it silently once, then perform it with the direction above: chirpy corporate, then unraveling, smooth, then erratic. Record a take with the teleprompter, listen back, and try one of the alternate reads to stretch your range.